Sunday, April 22, 2012
It's insane but... about a minute and a half ago I went in, put a damned bowl of ramen into my microwave, came into the living room. I did that all in the dark. I heard nothing, I touched nothing but the bowl in the drying wrack and the microwave and the pack of ramen and handle for the water. Yet.. a minute later I am sitting here, reading a possible source for a school paper and out of nowhere the sound of something metal falling onto the floor rings out. If I had hit something and it was teetering why would it teeter a full minute and then decide NOW to fall? Why wouldn't I have noticed? Why am I actually more comfortable staying in this very spot and writing this post instead of going into my own GOD DAMNED KITCHEN. Whatever. In about two and a quarter minutes i'll really have no choice, will I? My fuckin paranoia is back. But who can blame me. I'm seeing and hearing shit *STILL* who am I kidding thinking it's smart of me to go to a public place. Knowing me I'll wake up one morning committed to an insane asylum. Jesus Christ. I'm feeling so alone. But still I've got that lead to follow up about the girl I saw on youtube... and there's the fun project I want to do with my friend from school. Just too much on my plate to do it or think about it and yet I can't focus on this paper due in less than 24 hours. FUCK! And why the hell did I restart facebook? Who am I going to add or talk to? The sometimes AWOL Russian impersonating friend who shot me or the one who kept me locked up in a room for damn near a week? But hey, at least that Cen girl found me on there. No friend request soon, though looking at their blog aandcfromnytocali.blogspot.com I can hardly blame her for being too busy for social networking. The tongue in cheek is getting me in a bad mood.